all dressed up with nowhere to go.

I decided to get dressed up and do an outfit post for y'all, as I've not posted this week!

I also wanted to bring up something that's been on my mind recently. That is, whilst I love the rockabilly, retro, 50s look that a lot of plus girls are rocking (like the amazing tangledupinlace!), I think there aren't enough plus girls repping the emo alt look that I like to wear on lazy days when corsets and petticoats aren't really practical.

Also, I don't like the way plus girls get pigeon-holed into that look, because big boobs work with it, and a full skirt 'disguises' a big stomach/bum/thighs/hips. That's nothing against the plus girls who do wear these looks, because it's pretty, femme and I know they aren't all dressing in this way to hide their bodies. Also, it's a pretty expensive look, and whilst, as I say, I'd like to dress like that all the time, it just isn't practical to my purse or lifestyle. That is, I don't have time to do victory rolls every day!

A couple of girls that are great at plus dressing without the retro vibe are;
Carla, of messycarla, who I've mentioned on here before. She wears a laid back and cool blend of kitschy and trendy, and has her finger very much on the pulse of what's in. Not to mention her hair, which is to die for.
Lauren of pocketrocketfashion, who wears pretty and feminine outfits, but has so much attitude that she has a lot of edge to her style. She's great at putting things together that I would never think of.
Christina of musingsofafatshionista, who OWNS the all black not-quite-goth-but-nearly, highly textured thing she's got going on. I like the way she uses shapes that most plus girls would avoid, and how she re-uses things to create something new. Her shoes and jewelry collection too, UNGH.

When I wear this, I go for dark eyes, cool graphic T-shirts and skinny jeans or leggings as the staples of this look, along with a big fringe and a hefty dose of attitude. I like to mix it up on my off days (as they're so few and far between!) and this is one of my favourite looks. I wore this (with flats and a hoodie) yesterday, when the OH and I went for a walk in the countryside and for some delicious pub food.



If I were to wear it out, I would add my gorgeous, futuristic Carvela heels,



and a black tux jacket. I'm a bit head over heels for this Vivienne Westwood number,


but as it doesn't come in my size (or price range!), I'd probably wear this HOH for Debenhams one,


or this ASOS curve one.

On being the same person.

I'm not the same person I was a year ago, and this realisation hit me pretty hard today.

I was on tumblr, and although I follow a lot of amazing girls, I came to the realisation that I'm in no hurry to attempt to become them, as I once would have done. I think a lot of this is coming into myself - I have a house, a job, a boyfriend, loyal friends, who like me as myself, not as myself attempting to copy someone else.

The development of my personal style is a big feature of this. I used to only wear black, and refused colour on the basis that I thought it didn't suit me. And because, as Kate Nash once sang, "wearing black looks mysterious".

It didn't, in retrospect. It looked like what it was - an attempt to blend away and a defensive action - if my clothing gave away my personality, I wouldn't have to get to know anyone, because they would think they knew me. I've slowly and steadily re-introduced colour to my wardrobe, to the point where every day I am wearing a colour. I wear bright varnishes and acrylic nails - because they look nice, and I like them, rather than sticking to stubby black nails, because they were no effort.

One of my most interesting choices has been to remove all of my piercings. It was a battle, because I genuinely loved them, and had gathered them in an arduous process of getting my family to accept them (they never really did). I took them out, partly because I didn't want to hinder my chances at getting a profession that mattered to me, and partly because they didn't reflect who I was anymore. As much as they once did, I felt that I was holding on to them to prove a point.

I took them out gradually, and I don't miss them. The scars remain, and I am proud of them, but I don't miss being pierced. I'm glad all my tattoos are hidden, secret, because they are something I share only with those I want to know me. I am still rebellious, I still have strong beliefs, still embrace the ethos of acceptance for all that made me who I am today. But I'm glad that I can choose now who I let see my real "self".

I think it's important to mention though, I'd do it all again, without hesitating

I have more secrets now than ever, but I don't see it as a defense, or a betrayal of who I am. I see my progression into appearing more socially acceptable (apart from my weight, obviously - haters gonna hate) as akin to closing a pair of curtains on a window - The room is still there, but you can only see it if you've been let inside.

Me twelve months ago:




















Me today - outfit post to lighten up!



















you can't tell, but these lovely tights are black and white polka dot!
dress: Next
long-sleeved tshirt: primark
polka dot tights: primark
black patent mary janes: next

a fresh start

three facts about me:
i'm 22.
i'm female (and as such, a feminist.)
i'm involved in FA. (that's fat acceptance, kids.)

five things that I like:
cooking for people.
my ipad, it's an extension of my arm.
folk and pop-punk.
reading fatshion blogs, like messy carla, la pocket rocket and french for cupcake.
my little house, and decorating it.

this is a fresh start for this blog, and my six promises to you guys (that imma try to keep!) are:
at least six posts a month,
an outfit post at least every week,
lots of twittering and tumblring,
no negative body talk,
a spotify/last fm playlist every month,
response to any feedback - you want more outfit posts and less rambling? let me know!

I'm not very well today, so you have a post of me in my oh-so-classy pjs.